Excerpt from Wookieerotica: A Star Wars Burlesque Parody
Since the invention of Androids, man has eyed them off with their peripheral vision, wondering if their use could be extended from the original production specs. While generally frowned upon in society, here are some reasons why you shouldn’t follow through on your natural instincts!
Whenever you make a mistake, your droid will correct you. No one likes hearing they are doing a bad job, and it can be especially awkward during an intimate moment.
Depending on the strength of your Droid’s power cells, coupled with the rare chance you droid may have some faulty wiring in need of repair, you could be in for bit of a shock. This could lead to some slight electrocution if you are too close.
After some strong passionate love making, simple spooning can be complicated. Finding a comfortable position can be an endless mission, and when you might want the soft warmth of flesh, you’ll always be disappointed, and left to settle for cold, hard metal.
FOUR: LANGUAGE OF LOVE
“I love you” can be easily programmed into the Droid’s speech patterns (if you’re into that kind of thing), though it will always be a hollow promise and they will never mean it.
FIVE: ILLEGAL UNION
In most systems it is illegal to have a relationship with a Droid, with some taking it so far that you can be executed if you are caught.
A robot will function the same way every day. While consistency might be great in the beginning, as time goes on and the Droid’s behaviour doesn’t vary, chances are high you will bore very quickly.
You can spend a great deal of time customising your Droid’s settings so it runs to your liking, though you run the risk of all your settings getting wiped with a power surge or disk failure..
And 7 reasons why you should......
Read on in Wookieerotica now to read on. Go on - it's a treat!